Settling for second best. Why do people settle for less than what they actually want in life?
Relationships, jobs, friendships – some family members even; why bother just ‘settling’? Fuck that shit I say. I mean we’ve all kept the peace at times haven’t we, but sometimes you’ve to just throw caution into the wind where it belongs and declare ‘fuck it.’
I decided a long time ago, that I wasn’t settling for anything less than the best. Now let’s not get confused here – I’m not some princess wanting the earth moved for me (I’m quite capable of doing that myself, minus the help ta). I just decided that when it came to relationships (as in boyfriends and friends), I wasn’t prepared to settle for just anyone. I genuinely feel for those people who do settle, because all I can assume is that they’re not happy with themselves, to accept someone else’s misgivings too.
Suddenly single at 30, my Dad was keen for me to date, he feared I’d missed THE boat. Bless Dad; ever the romantic, he wanted the best for me, I get that. But oh no, I wasn’t about to settle for just anyone, just because my eggs were starting to mature to the older side too.
No, No, No. My Mr. Perfect was out there waiting for me – I wasn’t about to throw all that away because I was too god damn lazy to go looking for him and settle for second best; life’s way too short to settle, in my opinion anyway.
The same with friendships. I wouldn’t profess to have the largest friendship circle in the word; I like who I like and I’m rather happy thank you very much. I don’t need people in my life for the sake of racking and stacking numbers cheers. Yeah I know loads of people, but true friends? Less than a dozen I’d say – settle for second best with a load of fakes? Who’re you kidding.
The thing is, people don’t particularly like me. Yeah course they like me, until I open my mouth, and then they hate me. Bothered? I think not. I don’t set out to offend anyone, (the ones who do, are sadistic little shits in my eyes, but that’s another story) however, if I’m asked my opinion, then god yes, I’m offering it, just don’t go and cry and about it when I do give you it. Hence, the reason I don’t choose to possess lots of friends – I’m not about to settle for second best in this area of my life either.
I know lots of lovely people, and they’re probably great friends to have, we’re just not compatible on a deeper level if you understand me.
Family…. Christ don’t get me started on this lot! I love my family; I’ll be the first to admit that they drive me nuts (and they’re honest too and aren’t offended by this statement as they feel the same too), and it’s not about settling for second best with this lot. With family, it’s about attitude and not taking that as second best – just because you’re family, doesn’t mean you’re exempt from opinions, it just means we respect each other and one another’s opinions. There’s some people I’ll gladly never speak to again in my family because of how they’ve treated me and I’m ok with that. Because whilst you can’t change who your DNA is, you sure as can carve them out of your life; if they hand you the knife.
I could sit here all day and lament over why I won’t settle on this, that and the other but I’d probably bore you silly. My point is this; if you want something, like really want it, then fucking well go out of your way and get it. If you’re happy with second rate shit in your life, then frankly, you’re a loser.
You’re a loser because if you’ve married the wrong chap (because you’ve been together a million years and you’re worried no one else will have you, you’re pathetic), or if you’re stuck in a job you hate and moan your face off every day about it, then yep, you too are a loser. You’re a loser because you’re settling for second best and you’re a loser even more so, because you wont do fuck all about it.
Settling for second best may be convenient now, but when you’re on your deathbed, remembering your life, you’ll wish you never settled for anything less than the best.
Lastly, if you’re sat reading this, thinking I’m some smug know it all, then you’re wrong.
I’m just happy in myself, very happy because I sacked all this shit off years ago and I went out all by myself and got what I wanted. I haven’t settled for second best.
And I never bloody well will either.